Buddy Christ vs. Kali (With Kung Fu Grips): Coming to a Wal-Mart Near You

Beginning in mid-August roughly 425 Wal-Mart stores will be selling a faith-based toy line in their preschool aisle.  The line includes Ester, Moses, Noah, Jesus, the Virgin Mary, and more.  This is being billed as the first time Wal-Mart has offered a full line of faith-based toys.  For a thorough article, click here.
Okay, can we quit saying faith-based people?  What you mean to say is Christian toys.  If I can’t buy a Kali action figure with kung fu grips, your line isn’t faith-based, it’s Judeo Christian based.  A visit to one2believe’s, the company making the toys, website makes the Christ in faith-based pretty darn evident.  To see the whole line of toys, click here.
What my readers may find amusing is that I don’t actually have a problem with Wal-Mart selling these.  I mean, why not?  My problem will be when I find out they WON’T carry my Kali action figure.  I’m telling you, I could make some serious money with a Kali action figure!  My other problem is that the same people that are okay with little Billy learning about Jesus by chewing and drooling on his plastic head probably weren’t okay with this.  I love Buddy Christ.  I love the movie “Dogma”.  For that matter, I love Kevin Smith.  Where was I?  Oh yes, outrage and such.
I believe Ellen Johnson, president of American Atheists, made a fun, bitchy, and true comment in the Canada.com story.  “Isn’t religion the one who is always claiming that everybody is so materialistic?  And now we’re marketing Jesus dolls.”  Johnson showed amazing restraint since in that same article one2believe’s founder David Socha said, “What’s nice is that they’re real as opposed to other superheroes that are out there.”  I can’t believe the president of American Atheists didn’t take the obvious shot there.  Maybe she didn’t know he said it.  Let me help her out here.  Um, real?  To an Atheist, um, not real.  To a Hindu, not real.  To a Buddhist, not real.  To a Pagan, Wiccan, or Druid, not real.  Congrats there Socha, they’re real only to those who use the Old and/or New Testament of the Bible.
So here’s the deal Wal-Mart.  I don’t mind you carrying “faith-based” toys, but if I find out you’re opting not to carry other “faith-based” toys, or that your salespeople are ramming them down customers throats in an attempt to “spread the word”, I’ll be back.  And when I come back, it won’t be the Buddy Christ, it will be Kali (with kung fu grips!).