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October 23, 2007

The Resurrection of "My Sweet Jesus"

It’s going to be tough to have this discussion without potentially offending someone, but oh well, the giant chocolate Jesus is back and I’m psyched!  For those of you who may have missed it, last spring artist Cosimo Cavallaro created an anatomically accurate statue of Jesus out of 200 pounds of chocolate.  The piece, titled “My Sweet Lord”, was going to be displayed on the ground floor of The Roger Smith Hotel in midtown New York City starting April 1 (Palm Sunday) and run through Easter Sunday.
 
That poor hotel.  They had protests, boycotts, petitions, and even death threats.  Why?  Was it because it was made out of a rich, dark, chocolate instead of white chocolate?  (I always chuckle when I think of this option.  Have you ever watched the animated series “The Boondocks”?  In the first episode Huey explains that he never saw “Passion of the Christ” because it had a white Jesus.  The black verses white Jesus debate is also brought up in the beginning of the awesome movie “Saved”.)  Did it have to do with Jesus’ exposed Hostess Ho Ho (if you get my meaning)?  Was it the invitation for spectators to eat a piece of the sculpture, which was a truly inspired way for the viewer to allow Jesus to become a part of them?  Was it the Palm Sunday opening, an appropriate time to encourage people to consider the life of Jesus?  The world will never truly know if it was one of those things or many, since in the world of religious over sensitives no real reason needs to be given to justify death threats on poor bell hops who don’t give two craps about a giant hunk of chocolate.  Don’t even get me started on the ramifications of threatening artists over their subject matter!  It makes my First Amendment emergency lights start flashing.
 
All of that is in the past because chocolate Jesus is back, and he’s brought some saints with him!  The Proposition Gallery will be featuring an exhibition of Cavallaro’s work called “Chocolate Saints…Sweet Jesus”.  All the biggest and brightest of the Catholic world will be there in their finest life-like chocolate rendering; Saint Francis, Saint Jude, the Virgin Mary, and more.  And of course, “My Sweet Lord”, a recasting of the giant chocolate Jesus that caused so much trouble, despite being beautifully crafted and totally delicious in appearance!
 
The exhibition will run from October 27 to November 24, 2007 (to coincide with All Saints Day).  Hey, it opens this Friday!  Where is all the drama?  Well, all of us chocolate Jesus fans can relax.  On October 16 The Catholic League, the fun loving bunch that brought you chocolate Jesus protests and editing Kathy Griffin, issued the most subtle and not so subtle statement saying that essentially, The Proposition gallery isn’t very visible, that the idea of crafting an image of Jesus is appropriate for Halloween, and that All Saint’s Day just isn’t as important to them as Palm Sunday.  Of course maybe that’s just my sarcastic and biased interpretation.  What do you think?
 
“’My Sweet Jesus,’ another life-sized chocolate sculpture of a naked crucified Jesus by artist Cosimo Cavallaro, will be displayed in a New York gallery on West 22nd Street from October 27 through November 24. Unlike last spring, when we launched a boycott against Manhattan’s posh Roger Smith Hotel (the boycott was dropped when the hotel cancelled the exhibition of an identical Cavallaro statue, “My Sweet Lord”), the Catholic League will not protest this showing.
 
When the Roger Smith Hotel originally planned to host ‘My Sweet Lord,’ the work was set to be unveiled on April 1, Palm Sunday, and run through Easter Sunday. In addition, the midtown hotel’s gallery is located on street level, easily visible through windows to the public. Any child strolling with his parents through the popular area could have been subjected to the piece. And comments by the artist certainly didn’t help matters—he previously invited the public to come inside and take a bite of Jesus.
 
Since ‘My Sweet Jesus’ isn’t going to be displayed on the ground floor of an established hotel in midtown, and since Halloween is more appropriate for Cavallaro’s crafts than Easter, our central objections are not applicable this time around. The Catholic League doesn’t approve of the piece, but this upcoming display won’t be as public, nor will it be an ostentatious assault on Christian sensibilities during Holy Week.”
 
Although, none of this matters.  Not the Catholic League, not my snarky comments about the Catholic League.  What matters is that although struck down by nonbelievers, “My Sweet Jesus” is back…and more chocolately than ever.

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October 15, 2007

I Now Pronounce You Husband and Wife. Terms and Conditions May Vary.

Technically this is old news, but it has recently been brought to my attention by my Pennsylvanian Pagan peeps (that’s right, I have peeps).  What it comes down to is that marriage laws, are in fact, horribly confusing…and just got made worse.
 
Here’s the set up.  On August 24, 2006 a couple from York County Pennsylvania married.  The ceremony was officiated by a friend, who obtained internet ordination from the Universal Life Church Monastery.  Seven months later they decided the marriage wasn’t working out, so they split.  Then they read in the paper that unions performed by internet ordained ministers may not be upheld if they went to court.  So they took it to court.
 
On Friday September 9, 2007 they found out that their marriage never existed.  Talk about the quickiest of divorces!
 
This is the first instance in Pennsylvania and according to a solicitor for the state association of Registers of Wills and Clerks of Orphans Court as quoted in The York Dispatch “All persons issuing marriage licenses should comply with the precedent-setting decision.”
 
What was the problem?  In York County it was many factors.  The friend who performed the ceremony was not a member of the Universal Life Church before receiving his ordination, he doesn’t have a congregation that meets regularly or a place of worship, neither the bride or groom were members of the of the ULCM, also, there were no witnesses.
 
Honestly, the state of marriage laws these days are enough to make you pull your hair out.  In a fantastic article by The New York Times, they point out that “Connecticut is one of a half-dozen places that do not recognize marriages performed by someone who became a minister for the sole purpose of marrying people.”  That same article focuses on a pair of attorneys that had a friend, who again received ordination from the Universal Life Church Monastery, marry them only to find out it wasn’t a valid marriage.  The groom is quoted as saying, “If two lawyers can be duped into getting married illegally, then anybody can.”  True dat!
 
In fact, did you know that Connecticut, Alabama, Virginia, and Tennessee prohibit weddings performed by ministers who do not have active ministries?  As pointed out in the Times’ piece, “Even in Las Vegas, that city’s no-holds-barred image notwithstanding, it is illegal for individuals to perform a marriage if they do not have a congregation.”  They go on to quote a clerk at the Marriage License Bureau in Philadelphia as saying, “People call us and ask if it’s legal or not, and we don’t know if it’s legal.”  You’re beginning to get the idea, right?  It’s a mess out there and no one knows how it works.  (My girl Shira at www.handfastings.org can tell you ALL about it.  We still haven’t figured out what makes an officiant in NY, well, official.)
 
Back to the York County precedent.  G. Martin Freeman, Universal Life Church Monastery president, is quoted in The York Daily Record calling the ruling “capricious” and “arbitrary”.  He goes on to say, “It violates the First Amendment to the Constitution.”
 
Emily MacDonald, who is a member of the South Central PA Pagans, agrees with Freeman.  “Many people have chosen to be ordained in this manner because they ideologically eschew more popular denominations of ‘organized religion’ and physically established mainstream churches in their geographic area.  Often, as a result, they do not have a physical meeting place and sometimes do not have a congregation who meet regularly as such (although what one may mean by ‘congregation’ and ‘regular meetings’ is certainly an open question).  Does this make a person’s belief system, experience and ability to officiate a ceremony less valid than someone from a mainstream church with a regularly meeting congregation?  I do not believe so.  I believe this is discrimination and a flagrant violation of our religious freedom protected by both the US and Pennsylvania Constitutions.”
 
What’s got my PA Pagans all riled up?  Well, as Rev. Brandy Boswell, of Nature Church in York, PA, points out, “Religions like Paganism, Wicca, and Witchcraft are usually very private. It is extremely difficult to gather a group together when each person’s experiences in connecting with Divinity are so personal. On occasion groups do pop up, like the Nature Church. The unfortunate thing is these places are few, and far between. As you can see, finding an already established “church” for Wiccans, Witches, Pagans is difficult.

To add salt to the wound, Wiccans and Witches do not always meet in churches. They have Covens, Groves, and sometimes Circles. PA does not recognize these forms of religious organization. The fact is, PA is again not being told to see beyond what is most predominate.”


As you can see, some followers of certain faiths may only be able to study and achieve ordination online.  They may never be able to set up a congregation, or may have no desire to do so.  That’s not what you really want to talk about though, is it?  What you really want to discuss is not true religious seekers only able to find faith through connections online, but average Joes getting quickie ordinations online to marry friends.
 
What about it?  Seriously.  You have a problem with this, then hey, don’t ask your buddy to marry you.  The now invalidated bride in the York County case is quoted in The York Daily Record saying, “It makes a mockery out of the whole marriage system.”  Hey lady, you know what’s really a mockery of the system?  Couples, who aren’t religious, shelling out wads of cash and devoting their time to classes at a church they don’t attend, just to have a marriage ceremony.  What about a Justice of the Peace or a Court House wedding?  Well you know what?  Excuse me for wanting something more romantic than filing paperwork in triplicate for my wedding.  The duped attorney in Connecticut told the Times, “The most important thing to us was that someone who we knew and liked would marry us.”  Why not?  Why not have a close friend, who more often than not is who you turn to in times of joy and sorrow, be the one that oversees one of the most important days of your life?  As long as they know how to fill out the paperwork and you pay the state, who’s it hurting?
 
Consider yourself warned Pennsylvania, my friends are ticked off and I don’t think they’re going to settle for the new status quo.  Rev. Boswell says. “PA is clouded in their views of who is worthy of officiating marriages and it is up to us to tell our leaders what way they need to lean. Write letters, send e-mails, stand on the street corner and hand out flyers! Do something, anything, to get the word out! Let the people and our leaders know that our religious rights are being violated.”

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October 09, 2007

My Annoyance With the Ill Informed

I hate when people don’t read my magazine! 
 
While getting ready for work in the morning I watch BBC World News on BBC America.  That’s where I heard about this.
 
Attention Zara, the swastika is not inherently evil!  If only they were informed and had read my article “It’s OK, We’re Taking it Back: The Swastika” in Issue Six of The Magical Buffet. 
 
It’s a shame too.  It’s a pretty cute bag!

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October 03, 2007

Wild Nights Are My Glory

I know you should be in the middle of celebrating “Banned Books Week” but I felt the need to interrupt.  Last month the world became a little less warm when author Madeleine L’Engle passed away.  Despite her age, which was 88, L’Engle’s passing hit me fairly hard.  It took a while to decide what if anything to say about it.  A recent batch of storms helped me figure out what to say.
 
“Wild nights are my glory.”
 
Even though I read those words way back in fourth grade, even now, as I gaze out of our window and see a storm blowing in I say to myself, “Wild nights are my glory.”  Those words were said by Mrs. Whatsit in Madeleine L’Engle’s book “A Wrinkle in Time.”
 
I had not been much of a reader.  Then, in fourth grade our teacher, whose name I can no longer recall, forced us to read “A Wrinkle in Time.”  When I say forced, I mean forced.  We would sit in class and take turns reading it aloud.  You could not escape it.  I wish I could remember his name, because he changed my life forever.
 
“A Wrinkle in Time” slowly crept into my subconscious.  I couldn’t stop thinking about it.  Meg, the awkward idiot/genius with a fierce heart.  Charles Wallace, the young boy who represents the next step in human evolution.  The twins, so remarkably normal.  Mrs. Murray, the beautiful scientist with the violet eyes.  Calvin O’Keefe, the sport.  Mrs. Who, Mrs. Whatsit, and Mrs. Which, forces of nature, forever giants in my mind.  It, the giant pulsating brain of my childhood nightmares.  And the tesseract.  Always the ant on the edge of a skirt.
 
The fourth grade will always be a significant grade.  Every child I have ever shopped for has received the book “A Wrinkle in Time” as a gift the year they are in the fourth grade.  No matter how old I get, I will never forget that in the fourth grade I read “A Wrinkle in Time”.
 
September 6, 2007 Madeleine L’Engle passed away at the age of 88.  I doubt she’ll ever know how much she changed my life, but I’m sure she knows how many lives she touched.
 
It’s starting to rain now.  I can hear the thunder.
 
“Wild nights are my glory.”

Posted by r.l.elson at 07:06 PM | | Comments (1) | TrackBacks (0)


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