Earth Angels and Conflict Phobia

By Doreen Virtue

I was at a dinner party with several famous spiritual authors. Across from me was a well-known television psychic, and sitting next to her was Esther Hicks (of Abraham-Hicks fame). I was uncomfortable because the psychic had publicly disparaged my work in the past, but I sat there anyway, pretending that everything was okay and trying to make pleasant conversation with her. But she didn’t play nice with me, and everything she said to me felt like a put-down. Finally, the psychic looked directly at me and announced loudly to the table, “I just hate people who love unicorns and rainbows!”

Awkward silence. My energy fell. My face grew hot.

Then Esther Hicks saved the day. She looked directly at the psychic and said with perfect strength: “Well, maybe that’s because you haven’t yet had the experience of unicorns and rainbows!” There wasn’t an ounce of sarcasm or placating in Esther’s voice or energy. She was speaking purely from a place of fearless and centered power.

Everyone at the table was quiet. I wanted to run away or duck under the table.

Then the psychic shifted her body weight, sighed, and replied, “Hmm, perhaps you’re right.”

I looked at Esther with gratitude for teaching me one of my most important life lessons that evening. She showed me how to maintain dignity and inner peace in the face of harsh energy. Since then, I’ve devoted myself to studying and practicing this spiritual art.

I discovered that there’s a vast difference between being “nice” and being “loving.” I had lived my life as a “nice girl,” covering up my feelings to protect others, and sugarcoating what I said to avoid conflict. “If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all” was my philosophy. I respected authority without question, and stuffed down my feelings. Then those pent-up feelings would become unbearable and I’d either confront the person who triggered them or leave the relationship.

I thought I was being nice.
I wasn’t.
I was being fearful, which is the opposite of love.

As I prayed for help with my relationships, I began to receive important life lessons. I’d hear them as intuitive “downloads,” meaning a knowingness or Aha! insight would suddenly appear. Sometimes the lessons would be accompanied by visual or auditory teachings. I’d see visions or hear a voice in my right ear, which is the way the angels have communicated with me since I was a child.

The first lesson I learned was that sensitive people like me were “sent” here as Earth Angels with an important mission: to defuse and reduce conflict on this planet. Our mission doesn’t involve ignoring conflict. It involves resolving it. We Earth Angels are like loving-but-firm parents sent here to express God’s benevolent power to help others.

Here’s an example by way of analogy: If a child wants to only eat candy and says that doing so makes him happy, would a good parent allow this?

Of course not. Even if the child cries or gets angry, a good parent must say no to the request to continually eat candy. The parent may moderate this response by occasionally giving candy, or may substitute healthier treats. However the situation is handled, though, it comes down to the parent being strong enough to say no.

That metaphor is applicable to our life mission. When there’s conflict on the planet—whether it’s an argument between partners or feuds between countries—it’s akin to little children throwing tantrums because they’re not getting their way. We as Earth Angels need to assume the parental role, bringing about a peaceful resolution.

Managing conflict can be uncomfortable because Earth Angels are so attuned to energy. We can feel when others are stressed, angry, sad, or uncomfortable. Their emotional energy affects us directly. Fortunately, we can use our awareness to shift this discomfort in a healthier and more peaceful direction.

Remember the metaphor of the caring parent: she gets involved in her child’s conflict because she loves him. With a loving heart—whether it’s with your child, a friend, your spouse, or a co-worker—you step in and tell the truth. You reveal your real feelings, because you know it’s the only route to a long-lasting and healthy relationship.

Holding your feelings in is like putting a steadily increasing amount of air into a balloon. There’s a limit to how much air the balloon will hold before it explodes!

The preceeding was an excerpt from “Assertiveness for Earth Angels: How To Be Loving Instead of ‘Too Nice'” by Doreen Virtue, published by Hay House (November, 2013), available at bookstores or online at

About Doreen Virtue:
Doreen Virtue holds B.A., M.A., and Ph.D. degrees in counseling psychology; and is a lifelong clairvoyant who works with the angelic realm. Doreen is the author of “Healing with the Angels”, “How to Hear Your Angels”, “Messages from Your Angels”, “Archangels & Ascended Masters”, “Solomon’s Angels”, and the “Archangel Oracle Cards”, among other works. Her products are available in most languages worldwide.

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