Be Nice To Yourself: It’s Hard to Be Happy When Someone’s Mean To You All the Time

By Christine Arylo

Every day you have tens of thousands of thoughts run through your mind. The vast majority of them are negative. And too often, that negativity is directed at the one person who deserves it least – you. It’s okay to admit, you are harder on yourself than anyone else could be. You beat yourself up for all the things you think you should do better, should be able to get done in a day, should be able to figure out. You blame yourself and judge yourself way more than you acknowledge and appreciate yourself.

How do I know this? Because I have talked with thousands of people around the world from the age of six to eighty six, from all backgrounds, races, and social statuses and the one thing they all admitted to – when asked and when honest – was how incredibility critical they were of themselves. And how little compassion and forgiveness they were able to give to themselves. And honestly because I, a woman bred to have a high self-esteem, be a great achiever and climb mountains and career ladders in a single bound, never even considered self-compassion as valuable as self-esteem, until I realized what not having it was costing me – my happiness.

We are in the midst of a self-criticism epidemic and a self-compassion drought.

Be nice to others. We’ve been taught that since the first grade. Be compassionate to people who are sick, less fortunate, or going through difficult life problems? Of course. But direct the loving energy of compassion and forgiveness towards yourself, everyday – forget about it!

But here’s the truth about your happiness – it’s directly correlated to your levels of self-compassion: high self-compassion equals more happiness, lack self-compassion and watch your happiness drop. You more than anyone are counting on you to be there with open arms, offering compassion and forgiveness without condition. You are counting on yourself to love yourself. And loving yourself doesn’t just mean believing you can do and be anything, it requires you to be kind, gentle and compassionate with yourself always, even when you fail, fall behind or don’t measure up to the unrealistic standards you and society has set for yourself.

How do you do that? That’s the question I asked myself too, as I seemed to have missed the class on self-compassion in all my years of academic study. It wasn’t until I began my spiritual study that the answers came. I’ve learned a lot about self-compassion in the last decade including the following three daring acts of love I use like ‘love weights’ to strengthen my relationship and self-compassion with myself on a regular basis. Next time you start getting down on yourself, stop, drop and build your self-love by trying one (or all of them) out!

1. Transform Comparison into Inspiration – Comparison is the #1 toxic habit of your Inner Mean Girl or Dude (aka inner critic). When that voice starts comparing you to another person – either by making you better (superiority complex) or you deficient (inferiority complex) – stop and ask yourself, “What is inspiring to me about this person? What are they doing/being/having that I’d like to have in my life too?” Then, and here’s the daring part, you have to reach out to that person – either right there on the spot live or via email, phone or even Facebook or Twitter – and tell them what you appreciate about them! Then, and here’s the self-loving part, instead of copying them exactly, take the thing you admired and add your own essence to it. There is only one you, and the world is counting on your unique expression.

2. Be Your Own Best Friend – A true best friend would never kick you when you were down, call you a loser, or point out all the ways in which you are falling short. Good best friends do at least two things really well: one, they appreciate and acknowledge you for how fantastic you are (they love on you) and two, they give you permission to give yourself a break when you can’t give one to yourself. As your own best friend, your job next time you’re being mean to yourself, is to transform the harsh words and energy into loving words with the following Love Mantra “You are doing the best that you can, and it is enough.” Here’s the daring part, you have to close your eyes, put you hand on your heart, and say this mantra over and over again until you feel a shift inside – that will be your compassion turning on. And then ask yourself, “What do I need to love myself well right now?” And then you must do that thing for yourself – just like a best friend would.

3. Dial a Love Life Line – Sometimes when you’re really feeling like crap about yourself, and you just can’t find the compassion no matter how hard you try, you have to call in special outside forces. This is the time for “dialing into love” and getting some large quantities of it flowing to you pronto. Call up a person who you trust and who is good at giving love and follow these three steps: One, out yourself and your inner critic. Say “My Inner Mean Girl/Dude is going crazy and telling me XXX.” Just let it rant. Two, ask them to tell you three great things about me. Three, listen and receive those great things from them, say thank you, write these love lines down on a piece of paper and carry the love around with you for the rest of the day.

Remember, when you fail, falter, or feel less than perfect, turn your attention to unconditional love to lift yourself up. It’s time to give yourself one of the most essential kinds of love you can give yourself – self-compassion.

About Christine Arylo:Christine Arylo is the author of “Madly in Love with Me” and “Choosing ME Before WE”. She is an internationally recognized speaker and transformational teacher for women and girls, and the founder of the international day of self-love (Feb 13). Visit her online at and

Based on the new book Madly in Love with ME ©2012 by Christine Arylo. Published with permission of New World Library

Now That You’re Dead, What Are You Gonna’ Do With Your Life?

“Let’s pretend I blew up the school… all the schools. Now that you’re dead, what are you gonna’ do with your life?” – J.D. “Heathers”

That line at the end of the movie “Heathers” always resonated with me. I think about it a lot, even now that I’m out of school. Now with the “end of the world” approaching on December 21 courtesy of a misunderstood Mayan calendar, it’s been in my thoughts again. The world isn’t actually ending, just like none of the schools actually blew up, but what if we were being given a clean slate? Many folks are saying that this was never meant to be the “end of the world” but more like the end of an era, the chance or possibility for humanity to make some next leap to, depending on what book/movie/television show/etc. you were taking in a more global consciousness, or we’ll all move in a more holistic health direction, we’ll start developing more prominent psychic abilities, and/or more.

Sadly we all know we’re not being given a truly clean slate. Come the morning of December 22, 2012 there will still be children who wake up hungry, violence being committed for absolutely no good reason, and other atrocities. However I can’t help but think, “Now that I’m dead, what am I going to do with my life?” Despite the 22nd technically being just another day, and me being the same person who went to sleep the night before, I’ve found myself wondering if there is anything that I can do to perhaps make the world a little better than it was before December 22nd.

This is actually a tall order. I’m someone with no money, no free time, and an unpredictable chronic pain condition. Obviously it’s nothing I’m going to be able to readily answer in the post, and that’s okay. But it’s a question I wanted to start asking myself, and it’s a question I wanted to ask all of you.

Let’s say the world doesn’t end on December 21, 2012, what is something you can start doing to make the world a little better than it was before?

Favorite Things 2012

As many of you know, it was established last year that I am the new Oprah, particularly when it comes to the task of favoriting things. That’s right, I said favoriting. That would be the act of naming something a favorite. Not just anyone can name something “favorite”, you know. Obviously I can, and last year I told Oprah to pack it in. Honestly, the fact that she did it again this year is a little wounding to my ego. However, I shall not let it keep me from doing the thing you’ve been waiting for all year….. announcing my Favorite Things of 2012!

Thanks to the folks at Skylight Press a favorite book of mine, and in my opinion an occult classic, got reprinted, “The Magical Battle of Britain”. Following Germany’s invasion of Poland, Dion Fortune, started a magical working by mail designed to stop Germany’s efforts to expand into Britain. “The Magical Battle of Britain” provides a rare glimpse into Fortune’s real world workings and a unique perspective of the war. “The Magical Battle of Britain” isn’t just a book that is owned, it is a book that is cherished.

Once Margaret Pearson Ph.D separated the core text from all its associated commentaries, she didn’t just have a nifty book about the I Ching on her hands, she had a revolution. “The Original I Ching: An Authentic Translation of the Book of Changes” shows an early China with an ungendered meaning of yin and powerful, authoritative women. Of course it also shows you how to work with the I Ching, and it does so in clear, easy to understand language. Any woman interested in learning more about the I Ching technique or history, or both, would do well to get “The Original I Ching”. In my mind, I view it as one of the great female empowerment works of the year.

I love it when things don’t conform to stereotypes. For instance, people talk about vegans as if they are walking killjoys. They’re gaunt hippies, reeking of incense, who live to hover over you and make you feel guilty about you and the “murders” you commit. (Which I already knew wasn’t true thanks to a few kick ass friends, but you know what I’m sayin’ people.) Thankfully there are folks like Brian Patton, aka “The Sexy Vegan” around to shake things up and step all over some of those lame, outdated stereotypes. Patton’s cookbook, “The Sexy Vegan Cookbook: Extraordinary Food from an Ordinary Dude”, is filled with good humor and recipes that can be enjoyed whether you’re a vegan or not. I just want to go on the record one more time that any man that can work even a single drop of rum into a breakfast recipe is all right in my book. (Sailor’s Oatmeal with Glazed Walnuts)

Again, I love to be surprised. When I had received a review copy of “Mystery Teachings from the Living Earth: An Introduction to Spiritual Ecology” by John Michael Greer I assumed I was in for a lot of the Earth has so much to teach us man. Instead what I found was one of the best introductions to the Western occult tradition in like, ever! I learned an important lesson about assuming from that book. Primarily that I don’t really have to admit to it in my book reviews!

He was on the list last year, he’s on the list this year. As long as Inner Traditions continues to publish his books here in the United States I imagine he will continue to show up on my favorites. He’s Claude Lecouteux and he’s written many of my favorite books, whether they’ve had the opportunity to show up on lists or not. Let’s focus on this year, shall we? This year we’re talking about “The Secret History of Poltergeists and Haunted Houses: From Pagan Folklore to Modern Manifestations.” Lecouteux is notoriously thorough and this book is no exception. You cannot discuss poltergeists or how people would rid themselves of poltergeists without first spending a chapter thoroughly pinning down the definition of poltergeist. Trust me, with Claude Lecouteux you’re in for an informative and entertaining ride with the subject matter.

I love tarot decks. I can’t imagine anyone who is interested in the occult that isn’t intrigued by the cards at least a little. Despite having only rudimentary knowledge and an utter lack of skill with tarot, I am fortunate enough to see plenty of tarot decks. I reviewed many this year and they were all so amazing, but there was one that spoke to me. I can’t fully explain, and maybe there are some tarot readers out there who can say this experience has happened to them, but this tarot deck just filled me with such awe and wonder it made want to work with it, right then, right that moment. It’s the “Ghosts & Spirits Tarot” by Lisa Hunt. Each card depicts a different spirit, ghost, or liaison between the earthly and spiritual realms from folklore and legend. The amount of research that went into the deck had to be dizzying. The artwork is beautiful and often brings a sense of light to darkened spirits. I loved the “Ghosts & Spirits Tarot” so much I bought a second deck signed by the creator/artist!

I was totally blown away by “Power Crystals: Spiritual and Magical Practices, Crystal Skulls, and Alien Technology” by John DeSalvo Ph.D This book has EVERYTHING you’d ever want to know about quartz, and as a fan of quartz that makes me happy. What it is, its history, how to care for it, its use in meditation, and more. Add to that a fascinating look at crystal skulls and you have a favorite of 2012. DeSalvo’s blend of science and spirituality appeals to both my skeptical brain and my seeker’s heart.

Joma Sipe’s occult bona fides are certainly in order. At fifteen he began studying Theosophy and the works of H.P. Blavatsky and Annie Besant, and from there Rudolf Steiner, P.D. Ouspensky and more. At seventeen Sipe got involved with a school called “The Gnostic Movement”. In his late twenties he practiced ritual and practical magic with another mystical school. Inspired by “Autobiography of a Yogi” Sipe traveled India learning about Hindu religion. At the same time he was reading Eckhart Tolle’s “The Power of Now”, which then led him to study “A Course in Miracles”. Sipe takes that knowledge and funnels it into amazing works of art. Making “Soul of Light: Works of Illumination” a beautiful, stunning favorite of 2012.

I don’t know about any of you, but every now and then throughout the course of my life I’ve considered setting up or rearranging my home with the assistance of a Feng Shui book. Then you go to a book store and start flipping through some books on the subject and it’s huge, overwhelming, utterly complex……I think you get the idea. Then I got a review copy of “Feng Shui Your Life” by Jayme Barrett. It’s exhilarating! Everything is easy to understand, you’re given simple changes you can make right away, and you’re not made to feel as if doom awaits you if you can’t (or opt not to) make every change in the book. “Feng Shui Your Life” makes you want to immediately stop what you’re doing and start working your way through the book. I’ve never had a book about Feng Shui inspire that before, have you?

This last favorite is such a surprise that no one even knows I’ve read it yet! We’re coming up on the end of the year and that’s why now is the PERFECT time to pick up a copy of “Everyday Witch Book of Rituals” by Deborah Blake. Blake’s book features rituals for new and full moons, Sabbats, Handfastings, Wiccanings, Eldering/Cronings, Passing Over, and Rebirthings. Of course Blake wouldn’t just give you raw rituals and call it a day. “Everyday Witch Book of Rituals” discusses why we do rituals, appropriate etiquette when doing group rituals, how to convert rituals from group to lone practitioner and back again and more! Also, don’t fear, Magic the Cat makes many appearances. With everything you need for a year of magical ritual, and Deborah Blake’s good humor, NOW is the time for “Everyday Witch Book of Rituals”! Seriously. Go!

And there you have it folks, after much agonizing, list making, and debate, these are The Magical Buffet’s Favorite Things of 2012. So now go out and finish your holiday shopping, or perhaps do a little shopping for you. Be sure to tell the shopkeepers Rebecca sent you!

Moonlight Tarot’s Question Corner: Mystical Answers to Mundane Inquiries

By Angela Kaufman, Moonlight Tarot LLC

This column is intended to provide messages from the Tarot to address modern problems experienced by everyday people. Questioners, also known as “Querents” submit requests to have their issue addressed in a complimentary three card Tarot Reading published as part of the Magical Buffet. The reading not only addresses the Querent’s issue but also provides education about the role of Tarot as a tool for exploration and empowerment.

As the dark days of winter draw near, December’s Querent, who we will call Milton, is seeking personal enlightenment. He writes that he has always had a fascination with the supernatural and wants to know if he will ever have an experience that will prove with certainty that supernatural phenomenon exists and if possible when this will occur. Fascinating question Milton! The three card reading resulted in the drawing of the Moon, numbered 18, the Ace of Pentacles, and the reversed King of Cups.

The Moon is a Major Arcana card, which means it holds significance for Milton’s life path and personal development. It is no surprise that such a card arises in this reading as Milton is asking a question of value to his spiritual and personal growth. He is asking about a matter of belief, or more specifically of confirmation of beliefs. The Moon card deals with matters of the subconscious, unconscious, and intuition. On a gut level, Milton senses there is more out there than meets the eye. In particular the Moon depicts that which is often clearer in the dark, when the distraction of daylight is no longer present. Milton’s past experiences and interest in the supernatural are likely to stem from experiences that triggered his own psychic intuition, and served as an internal guide in times of darkness- both literally and symbolically. Experiences with phenomenon including astral travel, déjà vu, astrological or UFO phenomena and precognitive or instructive dreams are likely to have taken place before. Likewise phenomena that prompts attention to the subconscious and psychic realms but in a way that is subtle, behind the scenes- a slight nudging rather than a neon sign. These experiences likely triggered the subconscious to pay attention, something special was occurring, but existed in just enough subtlety for the conscious mind to doubt, analyze or rationalize. The realm of the Moon is the realm of symbolism, instinct and magnetic attraction of situations and conditions that stand to teach one if one is receptive and open. It is however a shadowed realm, it is one that requires an individual to connect the dots, draw their own conclusions slowly over time, and trust their intuition rather than reacting to their emotions- especially fear and doubt. It is also a realm of illusion. The light of the Moon is reflected and therefore transmits light from another source- but shadows can play tricks with the eyes. It is possible that past supernatural encounters occurred that drew on the experience of others or required research or networking with others for confirmation, but that this confirmation or even shared experience still left room for multiple explanations or possible doubts. In regards to finding proof of the supernatural- the Moon would likely indicate phenomenon related to the sky, psychic intuition or psychic dreams, experiences related to UFOs but that requires patience, instinct, and receptivity as the Moon does not deliver a solid message all at once but gradually nurtures a series of clues that unfold cyclically over time. It is likely however that experiences related to dreams, nocturnal experiences, and perhaps involving the sky such as UFO sightings have been brought to Milton’s awareness and maybe even personal experience- but with enough room for the conscious mind to bring doubt or question the receptivity of the subconscious to such phenomenon. Milton should try to remain open- view these past experiences like clues on a lifelong mission to uncover hidden esoteric realities.

Ace of Pentacles

The next card is the Ace of Pentacles. This is a card of mundane matters but also of tangibility and practicality. It is very different from the Moon card as the Ace of Pentacles shows physical attainment and tangible proof. There will be or perhaps has already begun to be- an experience related to the physical body, physical sensations or material property that will help to confirm beliefs in the supernatural. This is likely to relate in some way to your work or money as the Pentacles often relate to one’s resources or valuables. The material feeling of the Pentacles also describes this as an event that brings proof that Milton will be able to touch or see manifest in the physical. This card not only shows Milton receiving physical or tangible evidence he has sought for his belief in the supernatural, but is also an indicator of a quest fulfilled. A physical manifestation brings the answer to the question and confirmation that a desire dreamed about or wished for will materialize. This evidence may impact his physical body, material goods or property as well.

The following card is the King of Cups, and it is reversed. It is likely that the evidence Milton seeks will evolve from a trying time involving the well being either of himself or of a man he looks to as a father figure or nurturing male authority figure. A challenge to the emotional well being brings a quest that is not primarily supernatural, but a quest for emotional healing and restoration of emotional balance. It is through this difficult time that emotional security will be challenged but enlightenment and conviction in beliefs in the paranormal will come to be expressed. Some type of extraordinary communication or intuitive connection made with another- possibly a male family member, father, or father figure- likely brings this confirmation but the reversal suggests that this is not immediately felt as an accomplishment in Milton’s search for proof of the supernatural, but rather is initially felt as a loss, and an emotionally upsetting or unsettling experience. This will be an experience likely to reach Milton on an emotional level and may challenge the feeling of emotional control or empowerment at first. Part of this experience will involve a challenge to bring renewed emotional security and healing. When Court cards appear it is often an indicator of traits within the Querent’s personality but may also be mirrored through experiences impacting others close to the Querent. In this case a challenge faced by the father or a paternal nurturing figure will have an impact on Milton causing him to come to closer terms with his own emotional vulnerability and seek healing and a different perspective, this is an opportunity for Milton himself to grow in emotional empowerment and stability by experiencing this process.

For the portion of the question asking about timing, this is a common question in Tarot inquiries that can be difficult to judge. The initial card being the Moon card suggests some experiences have already occurred that are of significance and may have even occurred repeatedly on some type of patterned basis. The Ace of Pentacles indicates harvest and therefore align this event with the fall or a time of great material abundance that Milton will experience. As a side note unless a reading is intended to cover a specific time period i.e. “in the next month what will happen in my workplace”, it is useful to take the information from the reading as guidance and avoid narrowing one’s vision down to a specific date. For some patterns reflected in a Tarot reading are emerging based on the Querent’s actions and so if first a Querent is going to move, and then by moving be connected with a potential lover, the date on which the move occurs may not be as substantial in the larger picture than the act of moving itself. Also when individuals become aware of a date it can become a distraction- if one is regarding “May 3rd” as the date on which they will fall in love, they may then be so fixated on every person they meet that day being “the one” that they don’t allow processes to unfold naturally that would bring the individual to the right place and time to connect with their future significant other. As a general guideline it is best to consider time frames with as much detachment as possible, as things the conscious mind will try to prompt one to do to avoid/hasten an event can cause confusion when it comes to reaching one’s goal on a timeline anticipated ahead of time. In general from this reading, this is an event that would likely occur in the fall, and on the 1st (Ace) 18th (Moon) or 9th (1+8) day of the month, but in what proximity to the present is difficult to ascertain with Tarot.

Best of luck to Milton in his quest for enlightenment, and thanks for participating in this month’s column! As always, no matter where you are reading this from all readings are for entertainment only in accordance with New York State law. To the reading audience, thank you again for your readership and have a happy, safe and spiritually fulfilling holiday season.

Interested in being the Querent in next month’s column? Contact Angela at

About Angela: Angela Kaufman has been exploring divination through Tarot cards over a decade. She is a Certified Professional Tarot Reader and formed Moonlight Tarot in 2009 which would become Moonlight Tarot LLC in 2010. Angela uses the Tarot to assist clients in exploring personal growth and development, and in accordance with New York State Law offers readings for entertainment purposes. Angela began providing readings on a professional, “Moonlighting” basis in order to provide affordable readings to those seeking guidance, inspiration and fun. Angela is also co-author of the new book “Wicca, What’s the Real Deal? Breaking Through the Misconceptions.” (Schiffer Publishing, 2011). In 2006 she joined ISIS Paranormal Investigations and has accompanied the team on numerous investigations in private residences and businesses throughout the capital region, Adirondacks, Vermont and Massachusetts.

For more information on services offered by Moonlight Tarot LLC, visit

Check out Moonlight Tarot on Facebook:

For more related to Tarot and Wicca, check out: Wicca, What’s the Real Deal? At

The deck used in this reading is called the Hanson-Roberts Tarot, produced by US Games Inc and created by Mary Hanson-Roberts. For more related to the Hanson Roberts Tarot visit

Geek Month in Review: November 2012

By JB Sanders

Turkey time!

What’s Your Blood Type?
It’s the new “What’s your sign?”, at least in Japan. Several popular books have promoted the idea that blood type determines personality, with about the same scientific validity as the horoscope (perhaps less!).

Necronomicon in Academia
The blasphemous (and fictional) book of the Chtulhian mythos has popped up in an odd context — review by an academic. The article is also wonderful for links to various Necronomicon-related websites, including the Miskatonic University site, and a link to the paper discussing the phenomenon of the “believers” in the Necronomicon. Yes, there is nothing so weirdly fictional that a group can’t come to believe a complete fiction is really true.

Is YouTube Making Us Smarter?
Short answer: mostly yes. Long answer: see the IDEA channel video below. Basically, if you can avoid looking at dogs riding on turtles long enough, you can find a video to teach you just about anything on YouTube. So: yes.

Because Kirlian Photography is Always Cool
Stop by to see some photographs that use high-voltage electricity to make amazing pictures of flowers. No PhotoShop used, seriously!

Balloon Bag End
File this under the crazy mis-use of balloon technology. This total fanboy has used his balloon-shaping skills (you know, like with balloon animals) to create Bag End (Lord of the Rings) in his living room. And it looks pretty good.

Fabricating Nature
Interesting start-up in Norway whose aim is to create software modeling tools that will let 3D printers duplicate nature. Rather than concentrating on surface maps or voxels, they focus on natural structures.

Top 10 Places to Survive the End of the World
Some of which have been featured in previous Geek Reviews, but bear repeating. Not sure about #10, but I guess the country (Switzerland) as a whole might be a swell spot to start with.

Pictures: Repairing the Lower Manhattan Internet
Read about, and see pictures of, the massive job which is repairing the internet in Lower Manhattan after Hurricane Sandy.

Self-Filling Water Bottle
Another win for bio-mimicry. It pulls moisture out of the air to fill it with water.

Largest Statues in the World
Quick, what’s the tallest statue in the world? You’re thinking either the Statue of Liberty (US) or the Christ the Redeemer (Brazil), right? Wrong, both counts.

Wedding Rings for Geeks
So, you’re in the marrying mood, your significant other is a geek, and you just don’t want to go with the run-of-the-mill simple gold band, right? Try one of these on for size. Included are: the Stargate portal ring, the mobius strip ring, and your choice of one of the elvish rings (there are five in the picture, but I have to assume two of them are duplicates). Plus many more.

Caldera Floor Rising in Yellowstone
You know, the one above the super-volcano. I’m sure it’s nothing to worry about.

Island Missing
Seriously, authorities in Australia report that an island some geologists went out to investigate is missing. And not just “global warming” underwater missing, either, but simply not there. It’s not clear that the island ever really existed.

Castle For Sale For £200,000
But don’t get your hopes too high. It’s being billed as a “unique fixer-upper opportunity”. That means ruins, boys and girls. Still, at the small asking price, you tack on another £1 million for “renovations” and you’ve got a real fine home.

Help the UK Crack This Code
So, builders in England find a dead bird up a chimney in Surrey with a capsule attached to its mummified leg. It looks like a coded message circa World War II, but after a few weeks, no one has cracked it. See the message and a video about it.

Solar System Simulator
Get a picture from any angle and any spot in the solar system (from space, anyway). It’s the JPL’s solar system simulator!

Which Bond Villain’s Plan Might Have Actually Worked?
Fascinating article exploring which of the various James Bond villains would have actually gotten away with it, you know, if wasn’t for that crazy kid in the tuxedo.

About John:
John’s a geek from way back. He’s been floating between various computer-related jobs for years, until he settled into doing tech support in higher ed. Now he rules the Macs on campus with an iron hand (really, it’s on his desk).

Geek Credentials:
RPG: Blue box D&D, lead minis, been to GenCon in Milwaukee.
Computer: TRS-80 Color Computer, Amiga 1000, UNIX system w/reel-to-reel backup tape
Card games: bought Magic cards at GenCon in 1993
Science: Met Phil Plait, got time on a mainframe for astronomy project in 1983
His Blog:

10 Questions with Jayme Barrett

1. I’m guessing most of my readers have some idea, but can you go ahead and explain what Feng Shui is?

Feng Shui is the art of arranging your home and office to support you in living a healthy, happy, successful life. It originated in China 3,000 years ago and gives you guidelines to set-up your furniture, decorate with color and positive symbolism and bring nature indoors in order to create a gentle flow of life-force energy in your home.

2. You studied with Grand Master Choa Kok Sui, best known for his work with Pranic Healing. What was that experience like and how did it prepare you for your work with Feng Shui?

I was very lucky to meet Grand Master Choa Kok Sui in 1995 after taking a Pranic Healing class in Los Angeles. Pranic Healing ( is a no-touch healing system that works with life force energy or “prana” to heal the physical and emotional bodies. I studied advanced healing, meditation and manifestation along with Pranic Feng Shui with Master Choa for many years. He always encouraged his students to “experiment” with feng shui solutions and corrections to see if they worked and not just follow blindly. When I had the opportunity to write “Feng Shui Your Life,” I asked Master Choa for his blessing and he gave me specific instructions for what I could include in the book. I’m extremely grateful for his priceless teachings.

3. Unlike most books on Feng Shui, your book “Feng Shui Your Life” doesn’t just talk about how you arrange and decorate your home, it also discusses what you call “Inner Feng Shui”. Can describe what that’s about for my readers?

“Feng Shui Your Life” is about creating positive energy in your mind, body, spirit, relationships, work and all aspects of your life which includes your environment. When you feng shui your inner life and outer life, transformation happens on a larger scale. In Chapter Two, I write about meditation, asking for guidance, synchronicity, positive thinking, good karma, tithing and sending pink light. It was my favorite chapter to write! I believe that Feng Shui can be a lifestyle, a new way of looking at the world where you make positive choices in the way you think, emote and act.

4. It seems like you can’t escape it, you’ve got to clear away clutter. When consulting is this one of the most difficult undertakings for your clients?

Clutter is the number one problem I see in most people’s homes and it’s the first ingredient for good feng shui. Chapter Three is dedicated to clearing clutter and space clearing which you need to do before all else. Clutter massively brings your energy down, creates overwhelm and obstacles, and stops you from focusing on the things that are most important to you. Clutter is your past. You must clear it to open new opportunities for your present and future life. People’s lives change when they overcome their clutter. They feel liberated and amazing things can occur.

5. What is the bagua and what role does it play when applying Feng Shui to your home?

The Bagua is a feng shui map with nine different energy centers that correspond to specific areas of your life including Health, Wealth, Love, Career, Family, Creativity, Fame, Knowledge and Helpful People. It is a great way to be purposeful and intentional in the way you decorate your space. You can overlay the Bagua on the structure of your home and there are specific colors, symbols and natural energy to boost each area of your life. Chapters Five and Six give instructions to how to overlay the Bagua and what items to place and not to place in each energy center. You can overlay the Bagua on individual rooms as well

6. And if I recall you can also apply the bagua to your office desk at work?

Yes, in Chapter Ten, which is about the office, there is an illustration and instructions on how to place the Bagua on your desk. It’s important to use your intention and place what I call “environmental anchors” in specific areas to boost that area of your career or business.

7. In your book, you offer a Feng Shui plant guide and in it you say that the snake plant is a house plant to avoid. I found this to be a bummer because I’ve always really like the snake plant. What makes a plant good or bad for Feng Shui in the home or office?

Pointed or spiky plants are not considered good feng shui because they have sharp energy, which creates disharmony. Plants with rounded leaves create harmony, give oxygen and represent new growth from a feng shui perspective.In general, use plants that a baby could sit next to and not get hurt. The larger the leaf surface, the more energy it gives off.

8. The foreword for “Feng Shui Your Life” was written by Mary Steenburgen. I don’t want to pry, but was she nice, she always seemed liked she’d be nice, please tell me she was nice.

Mary Steenburgen is absolutely lovely as is her husband Ted Danson. They were gracious to let us photograph some rooms in their home and of course, Mary wrote a beautiful foreword. She is spiritual, kind and generous.

9. What advice would give someone who picks up your book “Feng Shui Your Life” with the intention of working their way through it?

My book “Feng Shui Your Life” can be used in many ways. You can read it all the way through to get a feel and then go back to work on specific rooms or on specific goals you wish to manifest. Each section has a “Take Action Now” sidebar to get you started right away. It’s a book you can use again and again for every new home you move to. I suggest reading Chapters One and Two to get a basic understanding of what Feng Shui is and how it can affect your entire life. Of course, if you have a clutter issue, Chapter Three is a must. There are chapters on the Bagua and on every single room in your home and office. Chapter Eleven is full of tips like “Health Musts,” “Love Musts,” “Wealth Musts” and a new section on Feng Shui for the Body. It’s a great gift for yourself or to give for the holidays, a birthday or a house-warming. Enjoy!

10. Parting shot! Ask us here at The Magical Buffet any one question.

How do you incorporate Feng Shui into your everyday at the Magical Buffet?

I don’t really….yet. I have to say, your book really inspired me. I want to start using some of what I learned in our apartment, our office, and my work space for The Buffet!

Author Bio
Jayme Barrett is a certified feng shui consultant specializing in energy techniques for personal fulfillment, prosperity, and integrated health. For over 15 years, she has studied Eastern and Western healing traditions, life coaching, and spiritual practices from teachers around the world. Her inspiring and transformational work with individuals, businesses, and corporations has made her a sought-after speaker on feng shui and life enhancement. Jayme consults on residential and commercial properties and lives in Los Angeles, CA.

For more about the book click here